SHORT PLAY 39
(An insurance adjuster’s office)
Agent – Doodle, doodle do, here I am at the office. I sure hope I get a customer soon.
Customer – (entering the office) I am a customer who wishes to buy some sort of health or life insurance, or possibly some other sort of annuity product.
Agent – Alrightie, let me just have you fill out these forms marked, “Buwah-ha-ha-ha”.
Customer – Why are they called that?
Agent – Just a formality.
Customer – Fair enough! (eagerly fills out forms and hands them back).
Agent – (looking over forms) Great, great. It all looks in order – wait…hold on, what’s this say here under “type of employment”?
Customer – It says “professional eater”, and I assure you, I’m quite good. Just last week I ate more than my own weight in hot dogs.
Agent – That may present a bit of a prob-.
Customer – (interrupting) And the week before that I ate 67 sticks of butter in under 3 minutes!
Agent – (thinking) How do you feel about a $1,000 premium and a $5,000 deductible?
Customer – I’d be lying if I said I have a clue what you’re talking about.
Agent – (Smiling widely) Great, just sign here where it says “Mmmmmm-ohhhhh” and then the drool marks.
Customer – (signing the form) You sure have been nice to me.
Agent – (takes the form and disappears in a pillar of fire).
Customer – I sure hope that doesn’t come back to haunt me.
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